Somewhat Resurrections

My dear, wonderful, fantastic friend found out today that her grandmother died yesterday. I found this out when I got home & it hit me sort of hard. Her grandmother had been doing well & making a bit of a recovery & so her passing was a little unexpected. I sort of 'wasted' chunks of my evening waiting to get in touch with my friend & spending time greiving/praying for her & her family. i sort of hate death. I know it's part of things now, but it just feels wrong - not part of the plan.... Mind you I have trouble saying 'goodbye' to people most days even when I know I'll see them in a few days... I know we all have to 'go' sometime, but yeah, I wish we could sort of hang onto the ones we love for as long as possible... (eternity maybe?)

One odd twist to the day was that my friend learned about her grandmother's death before leaving for work & returned home to find a letter from her grandmother in the mail. Just sort of an interesting event, one with mixed feelings; sort of neat to 'hear' her voice one last time, sort of sad to hear her talk about hoping to hear more of my friend's stories & adventures & realizing that her grandmother won't get to 'hear' any more of those stories....

But yeah, this event reminded me of an Allen Levi song "Somewhat Resurrection":

" She was thumbing through a novel,
that she knew he loved to read before he died,
and the writings in the margin,
caught her eye and took her by surprise,

for hidden in the pages,
was an envelope with her name underlined,
a letter he had written,
in hopes that she might see it there in time

i don't know if you'll find this,
if you do i have no way of knowing when,
it's just a somewhat resurrection
a way to say 'i love you' once again

if you have time to remember,
pull the pictures down of when we said "i do",
then read the cards and letters,
that you sent me and that i sent to you

play the songs we thought romantic,
sit beneath the stars the way we used to do,
read the Song of Solomon,
and imagine i am whispering it to you

i don't know if you'll find this,
if you do i have no way of knowing when,
it's just a somewhat resurrection
a way to say 'i love you' once again

it's only ink and paper,
and photographs that cannot say a word,
but they speak their quiet language,
with the strongest sounds her heart has ever heard

i hated going slowly,
but it gave me time to think of where i'd been,
it gave me time to count my blessings
to daydream through the memories once again

and i hope our times together,
might even now bring laughter to your eyes,
memories last forever,
even when the ones who made them say goodbye

i don't know if you'll find this
if you do i have no way of knowing when
it's just a somewhat resurrection
a way to say 'i love you' once again"

& so tonight, I hope & pray for peace for my friend & her family, for arms of love to comfort them, for them to find rest & not feel alone. & I hope/pray that she/they will find lots of 'somewhat resurrections'; that the joy & love she/they feel for her grandmother would be always fresh...

& yeah, hoping/praying that all of us who've lost someone find our 'somewhat resurrections'...