More of Annie's Thoughts on Faith

I'm reading through Anne Lamott's "Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith" on this trip. It's been taking me a while to get into the book - most of the early part of the book seemed like a long lament over George W. Bush's presidency. (The rest of the book has a lot of ranting about it, too, so maybe I've just gotten used to it.) But I'm definitely enjoying the book right now. It has lots more of Annie's signature storytelling & very beautiful & funny & poetic & rich & deep descriptiveness. It's just good to hear her honesty as she talks through life & faith & God & everything.

A couple of items caught my eye as profound/relatable tonight:

One was an insight from her friend, Father Tom, who says that "the opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns." This I thought was hugely profound (and makes me wonder how these 'wise guys" come up with this stuff - do they just sit around pondering thoughts, faces squished up like they're all constipated, & then something blindingly brilliant falls out of the sky & bonks them on the head?)

But this thought (the faith/certainty one) explains so much to me. Too often we think that doubt is the opposite of faith & we berate ourselves for having doubts, for questioning things when really that's counterproductive. Faith requires the unknown (or partially unknown), it requires risk, taking chances, trusting in someone when you're not sure that they'll come through (or can prove they exist or prove their love). With certainty, with facts, there is no room for faith because faith isn't required. It's like in Romans 8 where Paul asks, "if you've seen what you're hoping for, then why would you still be hoping for something, when you already have what you're hoping for?".

I find this idea liberating. Too often Christians are trying to 'prove' faith, to make it make sense/be palatable to the world around us. Deep down we sort of know that we don't know, but we're trying to look legitimate; look like we're not a cult full of whackos.... but faith by nature, can't be proven, just as love can't be proven. Sure you can see evidence that the love or faith (or, more accurately, the individual that you are loving/loving you/trusting) is worth of that trust, worthy of that risk. But you can never prove it beyond a shadow of a doubt. Doubt somehow is part of faith. The questioning is part of the trusting.

My brain (& heart) will be able to chew on that thought for weeks. This makes me happy 'cause it helps occupy the spider monkey (see below).

The 2nd profound thought was that Annie described her brain, in the context of the random worries she has, as a spider monkey on acid. I laughed at this 'cause it's so true. Once I start thinking/worrying, it's totally like my brain turns into this spider monkey on acid, bouncing around, chattering away like mad, swinging back & forth at a frenetic pace.... It's a wonder I'm not crazy with the way my brain doesn't shut up....